addy.io hosts data in Netherlands at upcloud according to their privacy policy adminforge.de also has public addy.io self-hosted server since its self-hostable at unbox.at

Codeberg is just hosted forgejo why are you discouraging self-hosting? Using codeberg has nothing to do with modern they use the same server software.

Yes they are self-hosting forgejo the software behind codeberg, for now yes you need an account but forgejo is slowly implementing federation via forgefed like lemmy https://codeberg.org/forgejo-contrib/federation/src/branch/main/FederationRoadmap.md