Yesterday suddenly got very expensive. Expected to replace TMPS sensors in my wife’s car. Instead picked up a roofing nail in a non-repairable spot and suddenly need 4 new tires because AWD.

I basically disappeared into a cave for the past week. After 17 years, it’s hard to accept the person you thought was meant for you will never be more than a tantrum-throwing value extractor. I’ve been cycling through so many emotions at random it made the most sense to stay in my room.

When we got divorced, at least relief was in the mix. This time, I’m kicking myself for falling for Lucy and the football yet a-fucking-gain.

On the plus side, there’s now a timeline on the commune. My housemates plan to put the house up for sale at the first of the year. We’re supposed to drop from the upper 90s (where we have been stuck since May) to upper 70s by this weekend, so van work can begin in earnest.

Started a new job. Not a higher position, but one that should be less stress. However the first day was certainly stressful and I already hate the commute. Don’t have time to do anything!

Pray for me that it will be a good move…

Baby’s sick for the first time and I’m sick too. Barely gotten any sleep since Friday

Extreme highs and lows all in the past week, and trying not to get whiplash from it. Otherwise it’s the usual grind. I’m really taking weekends and nights to be as peaceful as possible, reserving one day a week for all the really annoying chores and things that need attention. It helps to make it feel like I’m not on the Struggle Bus Express but a few days a week. Sending well wishes to everyone out there.

I’m on this side of the ground.

Meh. Glad to be alive. Glad to be healthy. I don’t like the direction that the world is going and I haven’t for awhile.

Other than that, it’s pretty good. Very happy for the people I have in my life.